Child Headed to College? Tips for Dealing With Parental Anxiety

Your child isn’t so little anymore, and they’re heading off to college to begin a new chapter in life. Even if they’re not going far, you still find yourself feeling anxious about the day they’re scheduled to leave. Maybe they’ve already left for campus, and now you can’t help but worry about them. You’re tempted to call them each day, and you find yourself checking your phone frequently to see if they’ve texted you. 

You know that you need to give your child space to grow and stand on their own two feet. But you’re not used to this distance, and it’s hard to distract yourself from these anxious feelings. These tips can help you soothe your anxiety while respecting your child’s boundaries now that they are away at school.

Remind Yourself That Your Child Is Capable

First, it’s important to remind yourself that your child has the skills and know-how to handle adult situations. If you’re concerned about your child’s skills in a particular area, work on those skills with them before they go to school. Sometimes, your child will have to learn by making mistakes—and that’s all part of life! It’s a normal part of going to college and growing up.

Choose Activities to Fill Your Downtime

Perhaps you find yourself with much more downtime throughout the day now that your child is living on campus. When you’re not used to having ample free time on your hands, and you’re not used to it, you can end up feeling lonely or empty. Make a list of a few activities you enjoy, or look up local events that you can attend on your own or with a friend or relative. If you’re not proactive about how you spend your time, you can end up wallowing in anxiety.

Reconnect With Your Own Friends

When you’re in the thick of raising young children, driving your teenage children to their extracurriculars, or bogged down by domestic responsibilities, it can be tough to make time for your own friends. Even if you still have other children at home, you have more opportunities to reconnect with your friends now. Reach out to friends you haven’t seen in a while and try to schedule standing dates so that you see them regularly.

Schedule Weekly Calls

Trying to contact your child too often while they are away at school can interfere with their independence. Instead of reaching out to them every day, talk to your child about scheduling a time each week when you can call each other. That way, you know you’ll always get an update on their week! If you contact them too often when they initially leave for school, they may not make as much of an effort to build new friendships or navigate challenging situations without relying on you for advice.

Use Healthy Anxiety Coping Mechanisms

During those moments when you feel anxious, it helps to have healthy coping mechanisms you can rely on. You might want to take up yoga, meditation, journaling, or another mindfulness practice. Exercise is a great way to work off your nervous energy and channel your anxiety into a healthy outlet. But what if you’ve tried all sorts of self-soothing habits and lifestyle changes to reduce your anxiety, yet nothing seems to help much? It might be time to consider seeing a therapist. They can help you nurture your relationship with your child while processing your anxious feelings.

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Are you struggling with anxiety while your child is away at college? Therapy can help you address these feelings. Book a consultation through our website to learn more about our anxiety counseling services.