Managing Grief and Loss: How Family Therapy Can Support Healing Together

Maybe your family has recently suffered a loss. The death of a beloved family member is devastating. You might feel like your entire family unit has somehow been knocked off balance. Perhaps some of your relatives have become distant and isolated, while others have been bickering. Some people might feel stressed by extra responsibilities they’ve suddenly had to take on, like managing your relative’s estate or planning a memorial. You may also be worried about losing meaningful family rituals.

When a family member passes away, it affects each person in the family individually. But it also changes the entire family as a group. That’s why seeking support through family therapy and navigating the healing journey together can be so powerful. Let’s explore how family therapy can bring you closer after a loss.

Safe Space for Sharing Emotions

It’s not easy to speak from the heart when you’re grieving. You might have complicated feelings about the person who died, or you may feel ashamed of your intense emotions when other relatives seem to be “just fine.” This hesitancy around emotional conversations can cause relatives to isolate themselves from one another in the midst of grief.

In family therapy, your counselor will create a safe, welcoming environment where everyone can share their authentic feelings. No matter how you’re feeling, your therapist will validate your emotions and make space for all family members to communicate their thoughts.

Addressing Family Conflicts

A family member’s death can revive dormant conflicts and spark new disagreements amongst your relatives. These arguments can revolve around finances, funeral plans, or interpersonal issues that were seemingly resolved or forgotten about long ago. It’s not easy to handle conflicts in a healthy way when you’re grieving. A therapist can guide you in working through these conflicts and finding compromises that honor each relative’s needs.

Setting Fair Boundaries

Some relatives might feel overwhelmed by all of the obligations that crop up after a loss. Welcoming loved ones from out of town, providing childcare, cleaning out their house, handling the estate, and hosting memorial services is a lot of work. Other relatives who may have served as caregivers for your loved one may not want to take on these responsibilities, feeling that they’ve earned the right to rest.

In therapy, you can discuss the most equitable ways to divide responsibilities during this tumultuous time. Your therapist can help you come up with a fair arrangement that factors in each person’s unique limits.

Healthy Coping Mechanisms

Grief can drive people to seek out unhealthy coping mechanisms. Some people in your family might be grappling with substance abuse, reckless spending, or taking other unnecessary risks that put themselves or others in danger. Through therapy, you can practice healthier coping mechanisms that bring you closer. This could include grief rituals that allow you to remember your loved one or spending time together on a regular basis.

Fostering Resilience

There’s no denying that grief can be destabilizing. Even close families find themselves struggling after a loss, and they might be feeling distant or angry towards each other for reasons they can’t quite communicate. With therapy, you can strengthen your resilience as a family. You might find yourself feeling more connected to your relatives, relating to them in new ways, and understanding them on a deeper level.

Grief can divide families, but you can also embrace this moment as an opportunity to become closer and more resilient, not only as individuals, but as a family.

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In the wake of a loss, your family can heal together. Reach out to our practice to explore how our grief or family therapy services can help your family after a loss.